emotions

When you have two two and three quarter year old girls in the house, you can expect to see many emotions flying around.  Sometimes you can see all of those emotions within 5 minutes!

Because there are so many emotions flying around, we are working on identifying what they are and using them appropriately. We have a pretty good book that we try to read often to help learn what/why we are feeling a certain way at a certain time.

The girls are good at identifying the emotions that other people are feeling; sad, happy, mad. And while I have seen them share a special toy with each other or another friend when they see how badly the other wants it, I don't really expect to see a lot of empathy from them. After all, they are still young, and it takes a long time for children to see the perspective of another. 

However, the other day I introduced one of my favorite childhood movies to the girls. The Fox and the Hound. Since they love dogs, they were pretty excited to watch it. Typically when we watch something new or read something we haven't read in a while, the girls point out everything they see. Usually it's just the physical objects; "I see a fox! I see a bird! Where is the dog? I see a barn!". But now that they are getting older, they are starting to point out how characters feel. "Oh, the puppy is sad. They are happy! They have friends!". 

But while watching the movie, Little Bird went a little further. The fox and the hound are friends when they are little, but when they grow up the hound has been trained to hunt, and the two realize they can never be friends. Tod the fox, lives with a nice old lady while Copper the hound lives next door with the hunter. There is a scene where the old lady realizes she needs to save Tod from the hunter, so she decides to take him to a game preserve and leave him there to live. The entire scene is visual, there are no lines to describe what is happening. The old lady sweetly takes the fox in her arms and brings him to her car. He is excited because he thinks they are going for a ride. She sings him a song about how much she loved their time together. They get to the preserve and she lets him go. He tries to come back with her but she gently nudges him the other way. He bows his head in sadness. 

At this moment in the movie I look over at Little Bird; her bottom lip is quivering, tears are welling in her eyes and she starts sobbing, unable to catch her breath. She says, "the fox is sad, he wants to go back with her." She wants to know why he can't.

I start sobbing too because I can't believe how sad she is. I had no idea she would even be able to understand what was happening. We snuggle and talk about why he's sad and that he won't be sad for long. Let's watch and see when he is happy again.

I was truly amazed at her level of maturity. I honestly didn't think that either of the girls would "get" what was going on in every scene of the movie. I was proud of her for feeling the emotions of the fox even though I was so sad that she was so sad. 

Maybe I went to far in letting them watch this movie at this age, but I think I did the right thing by talking
about it with her. It is, of course, how we all learn.

Little Bird continues to amaze me with her maturity. She really does have a soft spot in her heart for how other people feel. She is really starting to see things from the perspective of others and I couldn't be prouder. Yesterday as I helped her put on her swimsuit we accidentally bonked heads. While I didn't say anything, she looked me in the eye and said "Sorry Mom. It was an accident. I didn't mean it." Then she kissed my forehead. 

Seriously. Right now she couldn't make me more proud.